by Mike Peake

​The NEC Classic car show is the largest and most prestigious indoor classic car show in the country and is considered the show season finale. Competition for stand space is fierce and it is therefore quite an honour to be chosen to exhibit.

​This honour was bestowed on little old us. We are a non-subscription Facebook collection of cake-eating nutters that share a passion for old British cars. We are certainly punching above our weight and holding our own among the big clubs with their huge budgets and professional staff.

So, it was with trepidation and excitement that I was preparing. The run-up turned into a bit of a baking frenzy with rock cakes by Mother-In-Law of FB, sausage plait by Mrs FB and of course, award winning lemon drizzle cake. Thursday night arrived and caravan packed (thanks Mrs FB) I duly set off for my pitch on the driveway of Cole Towers. Arriving at 9.30, I had to wake up the old crocks in the chuckle wagon so Gar, Gus and Tosh could help push my van into the remaining space on the drive. The Brooks quickly returned to their van and with slippers on and blankets over their knees, they soon dozed off again.

Once my cosy abode for the weekend was set, Gar then gave me a full briefing on the weekend including all the required paperwork and passes and instructions on where to collect Martin in the morning. He also gave me his house keys with strict instructions to make sure the house was locked after we’d used the facilities in the morning as he didn’t trust the Chuckle Brothers to remember as they are in their dotage. (Tosh was 60 this week you know!)

The following morning, I was sat in my PJs enjoying a coffee and a bacon butty when I was rudely interrupted by Tosh banging on my door shouting “Come on, we’ve got to go!” “But the show doesn’t start until 10 today” I said. “9! Definitely 9!” said Tosh. I rushed around getting ready and emerged from my van to find both Brooks already sitting in my car - blanket knee'd and everything.

So it was off to pick up Martin White who had booked himself in the Holiday Inn next to the NEC. Except it wasn’t. He’d booked the wrong one. The one he’d booked was in Manchester. (Ok, OK! Not Manchester. It was about 3 miles further up the road than the one he thought he’d booked though. It felt like Manchester after Gladys the sat nav thought it would be funny to take us on a tour of every housing estate in the greater Birmingham area before arriving at the Holiday Inn.)
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Martin collected, we arrived at the NEC car park at 0845 “No time to wait for the bus” chimed the 2 old crocks from their bath chairs. “We’ll have to leg it!” Yeah right! Anyway, we legged it from the car park to the halls breaking the speed record for fat blokes pushing a wheelchair in the process. Flustered and sweaty, we arrived at our stand. We had the cake laid out and by 0900 and were sat waiting for the punters to arrive…. at 10 o’clock! Like I said in the 1st place!

​Tosh and Gus slunk away to be traitorous with their Humber on another club stand, leaving Martin and I to say hello to Stan and admire the 3 gleaming examples of British motoring heritage displayed on our rather fine-looking pitch.

So let me introduce the chaps and their cars.

A fine day was had eating cake, chatting to people about cars and eating more cake. Mrs FB and eldest daughter of Mike (Anita and Sophie) arrived too and we had a jolly good nose about the rest of the show, popping back regularly to give the other chaps a break (well check that they were behaving themselves really! They weren’t.) As Nick wasn’t there on Friday, Stan sold the Capri.

Here are a few pictures of some of my favourite cars from round and about the Show.

​After a cracking day it was time to depart the show and head back to the traveller site that used to be Gar’s house.

I have to say, I half expected trouble when we saw Gar stood at the gate pounding a rolling pin into his palm and I wasn’t disappointed. As I stepped from the car I was harangued, harangued I tell you. My ears were assaulted but I managed to make out the odd phrase like “Totally Irresponsible.” “I trusted you.” And “You’ve let me down but worst of all, you’ve let yourself down” all punctuated with bashes around my head with the rolling pin.
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It took a while, but eventually I worked out what I had done to deserve this assault. You remember I said that Gar left me his house keys because he didn’t trust the Brooks to make sure the house was locked? Well……

Everyone then went out for a jolly nice Chinese buffet. Everyone except me that is, I had to sit in my caravan with a thick ear and reflect on what I had done.

The next day, we did have to be at the NEC at 9am but even with all the rushing around, Gar still remembered to lock his house. Now Gar was driving we also took a much more direct route and we were already for another day of eating cake, talking to Muggles and welcoming an assortment of members that were able to find our stand.

These included Young Paul Cheetham with his trusty camera, old Phil Allin, creator of banners and flags and printer extraordinaire and Dominic Coleman, creator of our group logo and plaques for the cars.

Phil was quite pleased with his efforts as were we. However, he did have a bit of “flag envy” when he saw the 25 foot ones on the Mini stand next door. We assured him however, that size wasn’t everything which seemed to set off his de ja vu for some reason. I’m sure you’ll agree that Phil’s flags and banner look great and whatever Phil thinks they lack in size they make up for in quality.

​Daughter of Mike 2 was also visiting on the Saturday (Emily) which meant it was Mini fest for me. We had to track down every Mini in the show as well as the weird and wacky. We had a lot of fun between popping back regularly to give the other chaps a break. (Well, check that they were behaving themselves really! They weren’t.) As Stan wasn’t there on Saturday, Nick sold the steering wheel out of the Jaguar. But as all profits went to the club fund, I didn’t complain.
 
Here are some photos of Minis and some weird and whacky wonders! I even bought my daughter a Mini but she wasn’t as excited as I thought she would be.

​Amongst all the cake, Anita had sent another of her gorgeous sausage plaits for our lunch on Saturday, but it didn’t survive that long and I think it was gone by 11am. I’d learned my lesson after Snowdon though! Emily and I had ours in our own lunch boxes hidden from the greedy so and so’s helping man the stand. So, we actually got some this time!

After 2 long and very busy days, we were blooming tired so we decided to grab a pub meal on the way home and go to bed REALLY early so we’d be fresh for our final day on Sunday. It’s because we were working jolly hard and not that we are all getting on a bit now and can’t cope…  honest!

We were back at the NEC bright and early on the final Sunday. Most of us had seen what we wanted, so we were a bit more relaxed and mostly stayed on the stand meeting more members, chatting to more Muggles and yes…eating more cake. I think it is safe to say that we all had a great time and a great laugh with great people.
 
However, I did have what was possibly one of my most nerve-wracking experiences of my life. Lady Sandra Simpson of Boston had donated a glorious chocolate Malteser cake. At least it was before Tosh stole all the Maltesers off the top so by the time we got to it, it was just a glorious chocolate cake. So being fair it was felt that I ought to send some award-winning Lemon Drizzle over to the Boston Classic Car Club stand to return the favour. The rest of them would only spare 2 slices though, but the thought was there.

Feeling like a bake-off contestant offering up a creation to Mary Berry, my cake was presented. I heard that there was much interest on the stand as my offering was judged. I also heard that it was received quite favourably, even to the extent that one member of the BCC now walks with a permanent limp after being a bit too enthusiastic in his praise and saying that it was more “lemony” than her Ladyship Sandra’s own Lemon Drizzle. No one said whether that was a good thing or not though.

Oh, I’ve just remembered I’m writing about a car show so I best tell you about some cars. The stand behind us  was the Crayford Car Club and they had some stunning cars. All convertible Minis including one that had appeared in our group with a tree growing through the middle not long ago but now it looks incredible.
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My favourite car of the show was on this stand too with a great history. A Crayford Convertible Wolsley Hornet. You couldn’t buy these but Heinz had 57 made and gave them away as competition prizes along with the picnic set and paraffin primus stove for heating your soup. And yes that is a pullout makeup tray.

​The owner had written to Max Factor and after a search of their archives, they supplied all the original make-up to fill the tray. The car radio was also removable and could be used as a portable. The rear storage was converted to cool boxes too. We loved it and could be yours for 30,000 of your British quids! Or it could be if the owner could be parted from it.

​Well, all good things come to an end and sadly it was time to pack up and go home, but what a great time I had.

​I really want to make clear what a remarkable achievement it is for us to be here and it is solely due to the extremely hard work and dedicated enthusiasm shown by our team of volunteer top chaps.

I really need to mention, and on behalf of the group, praise worship and thank these saints among men.

• Our Fat Controller of Events, Gar Cole for his dedicated form-filling and constant badgering of the show organisers and organisational skills in herding our members.
• Our Glorious Head Honcho and Captain of the Ship Paul Sweeney who works tirelessly from his cave in New Zealand keeping us all in line and creating and funding the marvelous website that has done so much to raise our profile to the extent that we are considered good enough to breath the same air as the establishment car clubs at shows like this.
• Our Creator Lord John Simpson of Boston and Classic Towers who hands down guidance and support from his vast experience of his long, long, long career in the motor industry. (Apparently It was John that built Moses’ Triumph that was heard to roar throughout the land!)
• My fellow keepers of the gate keys and guardians of the Lift Shaft of Doom, Zebidee Habib, Edwin Feenstra, Steve Favill and Andrew Tanner for helping select the cars displayed and ideas for the stand and not chucking me down the LSoD.
• ​Martin, Stan and Nick for taking the time to show their cars and man the stand over the weekend.
• Phil Allin of Alveston Press for his generosity in supplying all our banners and flags that went to make our stand look fantastic.

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Finally, a huge thanks to all our members for coming up and saying hello and eating our cake. It was really great to meet you all. (Except Eric Dalton. He keeps being rude to me!)

​Thank All. See you soon!

So where we left off with windows roof lining fitted the wiring the wheels running gear electric's sorted then came some wood work in the rear of the reliant. 

As I was not going to be putting the rear seat's back I though I would lift up the back section a couple of inches so I could fit most of the rear electric's in and fit some box's in too ( did I mention electric's again ? ) sigh yes I added some more complicated wiring ​

More on that later so did this to the back end of the reliant the first picture show's as it was before I cut out a section next was a big hole cut out as you can see in the next picture it is a big hole but I filled it in with a box I made too on both side's as in the third picture and the forth picture the other side was smaller due the spare wheel being in the way and the was no where for it to go so next in the firth picture went in the frame work for the are to carry spares ect same with the boxes I fitted too they will have door's fitted to them in the sixth picture you see I fitted a back board the go's behind the front seat's that was carpeted later

​The frame was going ok till I ran out off timber so off I went to local timber stores for more wood and screws and nail's tell you truth I never used the nail's really as used mostly wood screw's and glue was high as a kite with evo-stick glue ( but it dam nice enough of that back to what you was doing ) oh sorry yes where was I ? WELL have to wait for part 11

by Kevin Thompson

So, after fitting all the wiring and lights for as many weeks and months as it took me, after blowing countless fuses and burning out some wires it was all sorted now. Then I had the task of re-fitting the windscreen and side windows. The back window never came out as it refused to do so. It was left in the door so that was one less window to do any way.

However, I had to fit the roof lining first as this needed doing before the windows. At this stage, Sheila had a say in the colour and did all the stitching. That took her best part of a week due to her hands not letting her do what she wanted through arthritis. She managed it thanks to her determination. So after that was done, it was back to me to fit it as can be seen in the pictures. It was a challenge but I did it anyway.

​Now it was time for the windows.  Oh God not the windows? Yes, the windows. Well the front screen went first. What a job that was! After a friend gave me a tool to use it was a doddle. Then the side window's went in. They fell in if you know what I mean lol. 

​While I was at it, I fitted in some speakers In the rear, but I changed them again later in the episode.  

​So, that was the main thing done, now body back on, running gear was back in, wiring was done, roof lining done and the windows back in. So what was left? We will have to see in part 10.